By in Random

What's Your End Game?

I sat in my chair looking at the manila envelope; I knew what was inside it and I knew that it was something that I had to deal with. The last time I'd updated my will was in 2008 and fate stepped in to literally save my life. I'd signed a DNR (do not resuscitate) form saying that I did not want to be kept alive by extreme measures. Not even a week after I signed it I was in the ICU with a slim chance of living. Being intubated, in hard restraints and unable to communicate because of the massive amount of drugs I had in my system I couldn't do anything but thrash around in the bed. That, of course, just meant more drugs.

For whatever reason, the will was never mailed back to my lawyer. Since then I've been meaning to update it but when I started reading over it I knew that I needed to start from scratch.

After seeing so many of my friends and relatives sandwiched into coffins and plopped into the ground to become worm food I decided to be cremated. This didn't sit well with my family but that's of little concern, its my body and my choice. If they want to intercede with it after I am dead then they'll have to deal with me torturing them from the beyond. A big part of my decision is portability. Once you are in the ground that's it, if your family wants you moved then they are going to pay through the nose. To be buried you need to buy a plot, pay for the opening and closing of the grave, the cost of the coffin and some places charge a yearly maintenance fee regardless of being above or below ground (buried or interred in a mausoleum).

My end game is pretty simple. A two day viewing, a wake and then cooked to a crisp. I already picked out the urn and paid for everything that goes along with it. The only thing missing .. me (dead of course).

Image Credit » by wolter_tom

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Telynor wrote on January 28, 2016, 9:25 PM

And may that death day be a long, long way away. I had a will and DNR along with medical proxies made after my mother passed away. She had, in her usual way, left everything a shambles, and I decided then and there to make damn certain that I wouldn't be leaving a mess behind. It took three long years, a long lot of family quarrels and a court case to finally settle her affairs. It was a miserable experience. Kudos to you for getting everything sorted out beforehand.

FourWalls wrote on January 28, 2016, 11:32 PM

I like your humorous approach to things here. As for cremation, many people are going that route (I think most religions have relaxed their stances on cremation [I believe that people used to think people only wanted to be cremated because they were atheists]), if for no other reason than it's about $6,000 cheaper than a funeral!

missfortune wrote on January 29, 2016, 10:20 AM

There are some things that I am lackadaisical about but after going through what I went through with both amputations, I wasn't going to leave this stuff in limbo. I have heard some horror stories about families fighting over things and people sitting in a freezer for months until the court eventually stepped in and determined "what was best".

missfortune wrote on January 29, 2016, 10:22 AM

I know how some cemeteries operate, there are several in this area that are flat broke and can't hire people to landscape or mow the grass. You can't even see the headstones in some of them. It's cheaper and if at some point I decide to change it and have my ashes scattered somewhere I can add that to the will.