By in Personal

Kick them out

"Don't let negative and toxic people rent space in your head. Raise the rent and kick them out."--Robert Tew

Whenever bad vibes in the form of veiled insults and innuendos, and others, are thrown at me, at the office or at home, I tend to overreact. My blood starts to boil; I become red-faced; my blood pressure shoots up. It's either I explode; or I clam up; seething, very angry inside, like a volcano ready to spew lava. The feeling is also like gagging, retching to the point of vomiting whenever I've eaten bad food.

That's the time my elephant calls his many friends. They rampage; thundering, they run towards me. The thought of them stampeding and seeing myself dead in their circle is just, counter-intuitively, very calming.

Because it's a cue for me to stop my negative thoughts.

My elephants are teaching me to filter thoughts and which I would allow my mind to linger on. They are teaching me to weigh people (or events or thoughts) that deserve space in my head.

Image Credit » by pgeyr

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morilla wrote on January 21, 2016, 4:47 AM

Well... It could be said that the elephants themselves take up a lot of room all by themselves. There's also the saying that an elephant never forgets. So, while they may be teaching you something, just be careful to keep moving, as it were.

JelWrites wrote on January 21, 2016, 6:21 AM

It's handy to remember that when people do things to upset us, it has usually got so much more to do with them than it does us. There does come a time when all of us do need to evict certain people from our head-spaces and our lives. I've been there a few times, it is not easy, but it has to be done. Some people, no matter how much we love them, do nothing but drag us down too.

vanGogh wrote on January 21, 2016, 7:54 AM

My bros are there to prevent me from making spur on the moment decisions or outburst which I may later regret. will the event matter minutes, hours, days or years later? If it doesn't, I get a move; if it does I discern a lesson or two. I believe that some people who put you in the defensive teach you a lesson. Both ways I don't stand still.

vanGogh wrote on January 21, 2016, 7:57 AM

I apply more compassion when it involves loved ones; prayers do help a lot for me.

RuthCox wrote on January 21, 2016, 12:30 PM

It seems as if your elephants trample upon the negative while allowing you time to gather your thoughts without an instant emotional reaction. Good thing! I tend to react quickly to negative in my life also and might have to visualize your elephants on occasion to calm me through.

WordChazer wrote on January 22, 2016, 4:49 PM

I love the idea of your elephants. I think I have polar bears standing guard for me. Equally bad news for anyone who tries to cross me.

vanGogh wrote on January 22, 2016, 5:56 PM

excellent idea... hmmm, polar bears and elephants, my elephant jealous right now, possibly in another time, i need to ease him with this idea...but here's to great buddy time with your polar bear

AliCanary wrote on January 23, 2016, 2:48 PM

This is very similar to the good advice not to hate people, because holding hatred in your heart hurts YOU more than it hurts anyone else. And of course, if you are foolish enough to hate someone you don't even know, they have no idea you hate them and couldn't possibly care. So what is the point?

BarbRad wrote on January 24, 2016, 3:27 AM

WE cannot help the thoughts that come into our heads, but we can decide which ones we will allow to stay there.