By in Personal

Where I have been

Winter is not an easy time for me. The darkness gets to me, and when it is cold, and my body is acting up, all I really want to do is hibernate and stay in bed. Having a Nook makes it worse, I can just lay in bed and watch Netflix or Hulu, or read, and that's not good. Namely, I have a house full of stuff that needs to be shifted through and figured out what can stay and what can go. That bothers me, in some unspoken way, as I keep putting it off.

Christmas was a bust this year. The stove in the kitchen has given up the ghost, with the heating coil in the oven burning out and separating. J has ordered the replacement, but that is going to take about a week or so to get here. So until then, nothing baked or roasted. We had planned for a roast beef for dinner on Christmas Eve, which is when we made the disasterous discovery. Sigh. As Rudyard Kipling put it, the bottom has fallen out of the world. Compounding it, J had to work Christmas day, and as things usually go, we did nothing. I got him a gift -- a favourite series on Blu-ray, but he gave me nothing. As usual.

Oh well. Such is my life, my darlings.

Yes, the depression beast is alive and well here in the house today. I feel like screaming or crying or throwing things, none of which will solve anything.

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LeaPea2417 wrote on December 26, 2015, 7:29 PM

I do notice that when something happens (like the oven not working), something else will happen right around the same time (like the car wont start). In other words, bad things or odd things will happen in pairs. But, I do hope you will have a better year this next year. May 2016 make your wishes come true.

CoralLevang wrote on December 26, 2015, 7:53 PM

I wish that you had been around last month when I posted about five gifts.

In fact, if you find it, follow the directions, ... I would like to do the same for you. Seriously.

AliCanary wrote on December 27, 2015, 2:02 AM

You sound so sad, and I wish I could help. I hope that you have someone you can talk to. Maybe writing can prove to be a kind of therapy? I would recommend making a commitment to sort through just a little bit of stuff each day--maybe you are putting it off because it seems too large a task, but if you get through it in small pieces, you will have it done in no time and will feel quite accomplished!