New Place New Semester

After a long summer of smiles, pain, stress, and everything in between. My May had started off pretty slowly, was able to rest after classes ended, that is until things occurred at my job where we ended up with new management.

Then towards then end of May I met a guy . All through June things were going great until it all of a sudden stopped, leaving me completely broken and an emotional wreck to start off July. Then to top things off for the summer, my grandmother had a stroke which led her into a comatose stage in the hospital and eventually her death (RIP). I've never had someone in my family die (except my grandfather when I was a baby). This summer has been an emotional breaking point for me to the point where I can barely feel anything. I used to understand the feeling of being "numb" but after this summer I can honestly say that I am completely numb . I feel like a teenager who wants to lash out at the world, but being an adult I realize that won't help matters. It may make me feel better but it wouldn't change anything that has happened. This summer has put me into a shock, one of the worst summers of my life.

Heck, this past yeah (from August to now) has been one of the worst years of my life. So bad that I am to the point where I want to graduate from this college, get out of this town, and never look back. Problem is, after college they don't tell you what to do next. It's all up to you. No more guidance or hand-holding you through the next steps of your life. It's all on you. What do you do after you graduate college ? Especially in today's society where jobs for graduates are little or unpaying. How are we supposed to live on that?

But just earlier this week I moved. Hopefully a new place will help give a fresh start. At least I can only hope. Gah, I'm just ready for things to start turning around. In June I thought things were finally going great until the guy broke me (I made earlier articles about him for those who want to know what happened) and then things began to spiral down.

Do you ever get tired of constantly getting back up with high hopes you won't fall again but alas you do?

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