By in Personal

Second Choice? Isn't As Bad As It Sounds.

"I do not want to be anyone's second choice" I overheard a couple of twenty something year old ladies chatting over coffee at Starbucks. That comment sounded so odd to me, so I'll admit I listened on further. And quickly looked to see if I saw wedding rings on either one of them. There were none.
The girl went on to tell the other, that she just found out that the man she is dating has been married before. I laughed out loud, and had to pretend I was reading a text to cover.
The divorce rate in America is about 50% unfortunately. I divorced and was married again eleven years later. I never thought my husband as second choice. I thought of him as someone I loved and wanted to be with. He had been married before also, and at our age back then it was hard not to find anyone who had not been married at least once. I think we both had the same thing in common, to raise our children first. then find love again. Not a second choice kind of love, but the real deal. My husband died last year, and I know he felt he was the love of my life. As I was his.
I left thinking positive thoughts and wishes for that young lady. That she will some day find her greatest love of all. without a numerical number attached.


Image Credit » http://pixabay.com/en/love-hearts-valentine-gloss-red-150277/ by OpenClips

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Comments

valmnz wrote on April 6, 2015, 4:34 PM

It's sad the way some young people are so analytical about their relationships. I think we just used to let things happen instinctively.

wolfgirl569 wrote on April 6, 2015, 4:45 PM

Unless you can manage to marry the first person who ever had a crush on you, you are not going to be any ones first choice. lol I hope she realizes that life is not here to cater to her desires or she may never be truly happy.

Kasman wrote on April 6, 2015, 4:52 PM

wolfgirl569 is right. Very few people get to spend the rest of their life with their 'first choice' and since the divorce rate is so high what's so special about first choice? We should really think in terms of 'best choice'.

MelissaE wrote on April 6, 2015, 8:10 PM

My first choice? Oh those girls will grow out of it. They still have much to learn.

Hollyhocks100 wrote on April 7, 2015, 7:26 AM

Taking someone to be your dearly beloved husband/wife in a second marriage doesn´t make anyone a second choice, what a ridiculous comment.

Deema wrote on April 12, 2015, 6:05 PM

I would have laughed as well. It does not make sense to me that she would refer to herself as a second choice if he was unaware of her existence when he married the first time. She should be lucky that she has someone who wants to marry her...

allen0187 wrote on April 12, 2015, 10:04 PM

Well, that is one way of looking at it. Rather see each other as a mere 'second choice', I'd like to think that it was a second chance at love!

iwrite28 wrote on April 23, 2015, 4:37 AM

I think each love is different.