By in Holidays

There Will Be Chocolate Bunnies This Year

The days of the "Easter bunny" leaving me a basket are a fleeting memory, though I remember being excited to see what was left in my basket. It has been many years since I have colored eggs, or planned or participated in an egg hunt.

When grandchildren came into the picture, there were "issues" in the family. The holidays lost their appeal and I stopped celebrating them. I isolated myself from media and commercial reminders of the "Hallmark version" of family holidays.

Living alone often times means being alone. Most friends and acquaintances made assumptions that I would celebrate with family.

The question, "So, what are you doing for (fill-in-the-holiday/weekend)?" was always awkward for me to answer. If the question came in past tense, after the fact, I might answer it, "Oh, it was a quiet weekend." It was rare to be invited anywhere, and most would not delve into what made it such a quiet holiday.

I had two invitations for today. I chose to go to my sister's. There will be family, including my granddaughter, who is now grown. The family dynamic has changed drastically in the past six months since my daughter and son-in-law separated. My grandson will not be there.

There will be quiet awkwardness because of whispered conversations, which will exclude me. I am rather direct, though not insensitive. People are not comfortable with direct. If it were up to me, we would just get that part of the conversation over and done with, so we can move beyond and see the joy of being together, as it is.

But this year is different for me. I went out and bought cards and solid chocolate bunnies for my niece, nephew, and my grandchildren. I will send the one for my grandson home with my granddaughter. My sister and my daughter will get one, as well, though bigger.

I bought the biggest chocolate bunny for my daughter's father, who is still my friend, even though it has been 18 years since we split. It was only two and a half months ago that he was undergoing open heart surgery to replace a valve and part of his aorta.

I am also baking a cake this morning. It won't be fancy, but it will be my contribution to the holiday table.

It is likely that there will be no card or Easter basket for me, but I will celebrate that this family is beginning to have some repair. If the whispering begins, I will excuse myself to go take a walk to choose not to include myself in the negativity.

And that, in and of itself, is cause for celebration.

© Coral Levang, 2015

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Image Credit » by skeeze

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Soonerdad3 wrote on April 5, 2015, 11:28 AM

I hope you are able to find some enjoyment this Easter Sunday, family drama can be quite exasperating. Since our families all live a long ways away from my wife and I we only celebrate holidays with our kids. Even though two are grown, they still live at home with us. The Easter bunny brought chocolate bunnies for everyone and a small stuffed bunny for my wife and daughter.

msiduri wrote on April 5, 2015, 11:44 AM

Families are like that at times. You can't prevent drama, but I to think you're wise to avoid contributing to it. And showing a little bit of kindness and having fun doesn't hurt. I hope it turns out well

CoralLevang wrote on April 5, 2015, 11:54 AM

Maybe there will be some chocolate bunnies on sale 75% off tomorrow for me. emoticon :winking:

CoralLevang wrote on April 5, 2015, 11:56 AM

The other invitation I received, which I would have LOVED to accept, was with a group of elderly friends who are what would have been the age of my parents. They have welcomed me as "family." Their family drama (as all have) isn't my own, so I can stand back and watch it without the emotion of it.

CoralLevang wrote on April 5, 2015, 11:57 AM

Thank you. I appreciate the support here. I need constant reminders sometimes. emoticon :winking:

Soonerdad3 wrote on April 5, 2015, 12:11 PM

I see, it is easier to be able to sit back and watch under those circumstances.

Kasman wrote on April 5, 2015, 12:51 PM

Family issues are heartbreaking. There was a time when I was completely alone one Christmas (after my divorce). I received no invitations to anywhere, no presents and just two Christmas cards - one from my father and one from my insurance company! Things got better after a while. They will for you too.

CoralLevang wrote on April 5, 2015, 1:05 PM

I have spent many holidays alone for the last couple of decades. Some it was by choice, but much of it is that we do not have a sense of community in our country as we once did. Or maybe, I am just getting old...

wolfgirl569 wrote on April 5, 2015, 3:37 PM

I hope it turns out good for you. My husband has a daughter who has decided that she dont want to talk to us so I understand the pain it can cause.

CoralLevang wrote on April 5, 2015, 3:43 PM

It seems that some families have more than their fair share of pain. I often wonder if those legacies are ever stopped in their tracks.

valmnz wrote on April 5, 2015, 4:59 PM

I do hope it all worked out the way you planned. This year we have our son staying with us for a few weeks before his life takes a new direction. That has been Easter gift enough in itself.

wolfgirl569 wrote on April 5, 2015, 8:49 PM

I hope so, but at this time for us I dont see it ending anytime soon

CoralLevang wrote on April 6, 2015, 6:12 AM

It was "interesting." More showed up. Will have to tell some more later. I hesitate to write too much, as not sure whose eyes are watching.

scheng1 wrote on April 6, 2015, 9:23 AM

Those negative people are energy suckers. Better stay far away from them.

CoralLevang wrote on April 6, 2015, 11:43 AM

I agree and I limit it. Thank you for the reminders. emoticon :smile:

PriscillaKing wrote on April 6, 2015, 2:55 PM

A very happy Easter story! Thanks for sharing!

CoralLevang wrote on April 6, 2015, 3:00 PM

It was a very awkward day, but we all got through it. Not without some tough moments, though. Thanks!

GemOfAGirl wrote on April 28, 2015, 9:53 AM

Because Easter landed so close to the tax filing deadline, my manager chose to make it an optional work day. Since I only have extended family in the area that does not invite me to their celebrations, and since I'm not a believer anyway, I volunteered to go into the office so that my coworkers with kids could spend the day with them. It was a productive day. In past years, I've also participated in an "orphan's hike" on Easter, that is, I've gotten together with people who live in this area that have no family close by and who weren't travelling to other places to celebrate the day, and we've explored some of the different hiking trails in the area.