By in Relationships

The Importance of Investing in Your Relationship

One thing I have learned from personal experience and time is the importance of investing in your relationship. Starting a relationship with someone should come natural and easy.

One should feel relaxed, excited, nervous, and happy all at the same time while feeling comfortable with just being you. If you're worried about what he will think of what you wear or how you eat your food than that's a clear sign while both may feel an attraction to one another it might not be the match for you.

I'd hate to say it but that old saying two becoming one is wrong. You don't have to give up who you are or what you do for the right person. As we fall in love we should nurture the respect we have for our partner and be supportive in their discussions and goals throughout life.

One should not have to give up time with friends or stop doing something we like to do. If he enjoys going to the gym, let him have his gym time. It's the perfect time for you to see a friend or take that relaxing soak.

Each person should have their independence, goals and ideas. You should be able to share these with each other without being told you're wrong, you can't do it or suffer negative side effects like low self-esteem.

There is a big difference between loving someone and controlling one's life. It's importance to find a balance between doing things together and doing things independently. It is within that balance that love grows and so do you as a person, for there are two individuals in any relationship.

How you communicate with each other is also a clear sign of whether the relationship is a healthy one. If all you do is argue you'll end up being miserable. When two people can discuss a given topic without raised voices or demands it's a clear sign of a good match. You want to be able to confide in each other, ask advice and be open and honest.

Sometimes there are hard decisions that need to be made. Ask yourself are you making that choice for your own good or for others. In any relationship the decision should rest on the needs of the person any given situation affects the most.

Example: Say one of you gets a job offer far away. While the decision does affect you it affects the person who received the offer most and therefore you should put their needs, desires, hopes and dreams over your own thoughts of self. While it will be painful to be a part you need to decide how much you love that person. You want them happy, you want them to succeed in life so the question is do you love them enough to support their goals?

This would be a hard question for anyone. And a decision which can make or break a relationship but I use this question as an example of what it means to invest in a relationship by putting the needs and desires of others before self.


Image Credit » Gerd Altmann Photos Pixabay

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Comments

inertia4 wrote on January 31, 2015, 1:15 PM

Wendy_Spickerman I agree to a point. We all have to work at relationships. Some come easy, some don't. But the bottom line is always trust. But when that trust is broken, then there is a major problem. And when one partner gets burned, well, that's almost life long damage. I was never a trusting person in general. But when I got married I let my guard down and trusted unconditionally. As I was supposed to do. What any normal person would do. Then after some years, she was cheating. And it happened a second time. So there went the trust. After the first time, we went to counseling. Worked things out. I thought it was over. Nope. It wasn't. So, now, I am back to my original self not trusting anyone or anything they say. I can say anything and make you believe it. I have learned over my years to read people pretty good. So, I always look at the negative before I look at the positive. What I have found out is, the negative usually outshines the positive. So, most people are just not worth it. I tread lightly.

peachpurple wrote on January 31, 2015, 1:52 PM

investing in relationship takes time and effort, patience too

BarbRad wrote on January 31, 2015, 2:02 PM

The Biblical concept of two becoming one doesn't mean that people should give up their individuality. It means, rather, that each partner is part of a unit with an unbreakable spiritual and emotional bond. Perhaps you don't even recognize you are one until you get old and think about what it would feel like to be without the other after fifty years of being together.

Glenn wrote on January 31, 2015, 11:06 PM

I like to think of a relationship as a team effort. More importantly, both partners should function as though they are both on the same team. So whatever decisions need to be made, such as in your example, the final conclusion needs to be made as a mutual team effort.

Magnolia wrote on February 1, 2015, 10:48 PM

Hi Wendy. Welcome to Persona Paper. Of course this is a great post, as I knew it would be. Thank you,

allen0187 wrote on January 1, 2016, 6:16 PM

I agree that it is important to invest in realtionships. More often than not, I find myself in between wanting to try harder and totally giving up and moving on. Sad but true...

LeaPea2417 wrote on January 1, 2016, 11:24 PM

I agree it is very important in investing in relationships. I try to invest the best into my marriage relationship.