By in Random

A Few Ways To Be The Bigger Person

Currently in my personal life I am going through a situation where I am trying my best to be the bigger person. It is challenging but I know in the long run I will proud of myself for handling the situation in a mature manner. Here are a few tips on how to be the bigger person I would like to share.

Walk away from the conflict -- This is by far the most challenging part of it for me. I am the type of person who instantly sees red when I get angry. I begin fighting physically or verbally when I feel threatened. As an adult and a mother I know that's not the right thing to do. However it's hard to just walk away from. The old me is always there egging me on. I feel like I have the devil on one shoulder and the angel on the other. I used to feel I would look weak or scared if I walked away, but now I see it as the mature thing to do. I tell myself the situation is not that important for me to get lost in and loss my energy over. It takes a bigger person to just walk away then it does to start swinging. You'll feel better about yourself after.

Don't hold grudges -- Another hard thing for me to do. Once someone wrongs me I have a hard time letting it go. When we hold a grudge we are only hurting ourselves. We feel pessimistic and hostile and hold it in for such a long time it damages us. We start holding more and more grudges and end up being unhappy. We have to realize no one is perfect, including ourselves. Let things go and you'll live a happier life. If someone wrongs you multiple times maybe it's time to let go of that person.

Agree to disagree -- No one agrees on everything and acknowledging that is key in allowing others to have their opinion without feeling bad for it. You can both be right in your own way. It's either that or debating for hours upon hours with no resolution in site. There's no need to argue to make someone agree with you. Listen to what they have to say, say what you have to say and end it with a smile instead of a fight.

Don't take everything personal -- Of course this one is another tough one. I tend to get very defensive when I feel someone is criticizing me. We all have flaws and that's what makes us each unique. There is always going to be that person who has something negative to say or doesn't see things the same as you do. They will criticize you for their own reason, but how you take it says a lot about you. Do your best not to let it effect you or bring you down. If you do start arguing you are only giving into the person and maybe that's exactly what they want. Sometimes the criticism helps you and others not so much. Those are the times I try and take it as an insignificant comment.

Image Credit »

You will need an account to comment - feel free to register or login.


lucyluuk wrote on January 3, 2015, 2:48 PM

Sometimes it is not easy to be the bigger person but it will help you keep your dignity and your sanity!

who_wants_a_fish wrote on January 3, 2015, 3:18 PM

I like this it's all way's I agree on! Although I may like them but I am a bugger for most of them I hold grudges I try not to but I do and oh my word do I take things personally whoops! Maybe I should try harder in the new year!

ison1 wrote on January 3, 2015, 3:23 PM

Hey Natalie :) I agree with everything you say, just some times it is soooo hard to implement it!

PattyTherre wrote on January 3, 2015, 4:14 PM

It's so hard to be the bigger person when you are wronged. I can do all of the above but I DO hold grudges and some I will never let go of. I can't and don't want to. I never want to be treated the same way and holding a grudge reminds me every day what a fool I was to trust certain people. But I do walk away and agree to disagree because it's not worth the stress of fighting.

seren3 wrote on January 3, 2015, 6:11 PM

What a great post! I have been through similar challenges. I used to be considered so calm I was spooky. An old boss used to call me "the goddess". But then I hit a wall. A very bad wall. After that came a huge learning curve for me. All I can say is I'm still alive!

catsholiday wrote on January 4, 2015, 10:58 AM

I get resentful and hold grudges too but have become much more laid back about other things than I used to be. It isn't easy and i still struggle