By in Health & Fitness

Working With a Narcissist

In all of my years working, I've worked with many types and temperaments of people. Lately I've had to do some temporary work with someone who is very much a narcissist. I've read of these types of people, seen them in action but have never personally dealt with one in the workplace. Within the first day of working with him I noticed he was extremely competitive, not just in the big things but in simple areas that there is no reason to be competitive over. A certain level of competitiveness is healthy, but when it becomes a tool to undermine others, steal their ideas, or make someone look bad, so they can get ahead, it becomes an unhealthy tool to elevate the self and bring down others.

I've noticed that narcissists crave admiration and constant praise, they can't get enough. It seems to be their primary drive and focus in life. They admire themselves, and expect that others will do the same. They need to feel superior to others in every way, and will always exaggerate their experiences, accomplishments, and talents to seek the admiration and praise of others. They will back stab, lie and cheat to get ahead. If you have an idea, they will claim it as their own, they will try to undermine attempts made by others to succeed. They are extremely selfish, lack empathy for others and think only of themselves. People are just competition to be eradicated or used to get to what they want.

Many narcissists are able to put on a great face and present themselves well. They can appear to be friendly, kind, and thoughtful if your relationship with them is casual, and you pose no threat to them. With people they are close to they can't hide behind a friendly mask all the time and their arrogance, sense of entitlement, envy and jealousy soon come to the forefront. They are adept at exploiting others to get what they want, are extremely controlling and manipulative. Sadly, everything is all about them, selfishness is a virtue they work hard at.

As long as you don't pose a threat to them they can be very likeable, but look out if they think you are. I survived 2 weeks working with one. Thankfully, everyone in the office knew this person's personality. All attempts he made to be superior, to undermine others, or seek praise and admiration above others were ignored. And he left not a very happy camper! In some cases though, they can make life miserable in a workplace situation where they aren't known to staff or management. This can make it hard if they target only a few co-workers, as to others they appear to be friendly and kind. For those targeted by a narcissist this makes it hard to reach out for help. My heart goes out to anyone that has to deal with a narcissist at home, or in the workplace.

Have you ever had an experience with a narcissist?

#Narcissism * *

Image Credit »

You will need an account to comment - feel free to register or login.


aolo wrote on September 6, 2014, 2:05 AM

I really don't like narcissist especially the vapid ones; all they do is think about themselves! its like others do not exist!

BarbRad wrote on September 6, 2014, 2:41 AM

I've never had to deal with one in the workplace, but I think I'm suffering from having one in public office.

LynnWrites wrote on September 6, 2014, 2:51 AM

LOL...that made me laugh, but its not funny as its probably true!

suffolkjason wrote on September 6, 2014, 4:54 AM

These sort of people are high maintenance- and that's unfair on self-reliant types.

Scorpie wrote on September 6, 2014, 8:20 AM

OMG that's a funny picture. The last time I worked for someone else was when I was 17. I was completely tortured by the incompetence of my employers even then.

Ellis wrote on September 6, 2014, 9:44 AM

I think these people feel inadequate to other people and overcompensate by trying to convince others that they are better...

LynnWrites wrote on September 6, 2014, 5:06 PM

That was the only photo I could find that seemed to fit a narcissit, , I thought it fit! LOL

LynnWrites wrote on September 6, 2014, 5:08 PM

I agree, . They don't feel comfortable with who they are and haven't learned that the success of another doesn't diminish them in anyway.

Feisty56 wrote on September 6, 2014, 5:59 PM

I have worked with a few narcissists in my years; one woman stands taller in my memory than all the others. I'm fairly certain I have been in romantic relationships with at least two men who were narcissistic and have come to understand that my mother has the characteristics of a narcissist. What I've learned from my experience with this type of person is that they seek not only to steal others' thunder, but to suck the very marrow of life from the bones of those around them.

Sorry, I'm off my soapbox now.

LynnWrites wrote on September 6, 2014, 11:00 PM

How right you are...they are more common then they realize. You put it perfectly the steal your thunder and suck the life out of those around them....well said, Feisty56